Author Archives: guest

Motivating Kids: Rachel’s Bean Magic

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A few years ago a stateswoman, Rachel DeMille, shared a fun motivational program she used in her home, called “bean counter”, in a lecture I heard. I don’t where the idea of a “bean counter” originated from, but I do know that it is effective. Thanks DeMille family!

Our “Refusing to Help Each Other” Problem

Recently we have found another great use for the “bean counter” motivational system in our home. A couple of weeks ago I noticed a behavior which was working against our family mission and vision. And, the behavior was not isolated to one person. The problem behavior was spreading, like a disease, through the whole family. The feelings of frustration and contention were definitely on the rise in our home. The culprit was selfishness and the problem looked like this.

Youngest son says, “Dad, will you get me a drink of water?”

Dad says, “Porter, you know how to get your own drink. You can get it yourself.” Following this response, the son becomes frustrated and chooses to whine. The whinny behavior earns negative consequences and the son doesn’t get a drink because he is now busy learning how to accept a no answer.

Why did Dad give Porter the response he gave? Continue reading →

I Need Your Help!

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As many of you may know I am a woman with a mission. Quite simply, the mission is to assist in healing homes in preparation for difficult and exciting times to come. If the families of the world follow correct principles and live lives of love, selflessness, self-control, and good communication, then they will be ready to weather the storms of life in these days and to be ready for the exciting times ahead.

I have been given a message to share with the world which will bring peace to homes and souls. We all have a purpose and we must fit ourselves to it.

No mission was meant to be done alone, and I need your help with my mission. My mission is taking me to China in November, as a Utah Mormon to meet with Chinese officials and high ranking business people about strengthening the families of China. They want me to come share my parenting principles with them so that they can improve Chinese families too. They were looking for help, and they found me, a Mormon mother who has a mission to share truth about families to the world.

I have been invited, but the problem is no money will be given to me to go to China to spread this great message. I can’t sell anything there, because the government has to approve everything, and all the speaking assignments are scheduled to be free as a sign of good will from us. This trip will cost thousands of dollars, and I don’t have the money.

I know I am supposed to go, and have faith that things will work out, but faith without works is dead. I am acting on a feeling here and asking if any of you would want to support or donate to this mission. If so, you can email me privately at nicholeen@teachingselfgovernment.com This is how the Chinese found out about me. Continue reading →

Austrailia Sees LDS Television Show

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I recently recieved the comment below from an M* friend in Austrailia.  Apparently The World’s Strictest Parents Utah has aired in Austrailia finally.  The BBC in Britain told me a while ago that only our episode was bought by other television stations in other countries because of it’s popularity.  They said our episode was the most watched episode ever on the BBC and it was up for an English television award as well.  This made it a show the rest of the world was interested in seeing too. 

The BBC specifically mentioned that Austrailia had bought the show months ago, but I didn’t know when it would air.  Apparently, it just happened.  It is so exciting to see the Lord’s hand in this project.  Our family feels blessed to have been apart of this mission to strengthen families around the world.  And, we absolutely LOVE the friends we have made and heard from around the world as well.  That is probably one of the best parts of it all for us. 

The Comment

Nicholeen, your episode of “World’s Strictest Parents” has just aired here in Australia. I Continue reading →

Teenage Attitude Problems

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This last week my twelve year old daughter had an attitude problem a number of times in one day.  This is very unusual for her and definitely had me analyzing her and the day.  She earned negative consequences many times and we had talks about the situations and practiced how she could have handled them better.  I really focused on seeking to understand.  At one point, after she was calmed down I initiated a conversation to discuss her possible need for more sleep.  During this conversation she said, “I just feel like no one really understands.  I bet you have never felt like this.”  Continue reading →

How Do You Get Your Way?

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In May 2009 I allowed the BBC Britain to bring two troubled British teens to my home to make a show called “The World’s Strictest Parents.”  They brought me two seventeen year olds named Hannah and James.  For two days Hannah and James had tantrums and tried every way they could think of to initiate power struggles and force us to become aggressive.  This is generally called, “button pushing.”  What they didn’t know was that I got rid of all my buttons long ago. 

            On day three the teens were all of the sudden completely different.  They were obedient and generally wanted to communicate effectively.  I was really impressed with their new personalities.  I said to Hannah, “Hannah, why did you suddenly stop yelling and getting angry?” 

            She said, “Well, at my house if I yell I get my way or someone at least yells back.  But, here you always stay so calm that it doesn’t do any good.  So, I just figured I might as well try staying calm too.”  Because Hannah saw that her aggression wouldn’t work, she was able to completely change the way she communicated.  So what did Hannah give up her aggression for? Continue reading →