Kids are not fine in the modern family

From the “The Family Proclamation”:

The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed.

We warn that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.

We call upon responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society.

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About Geoff B.

Geoff B graduated from Stanford University (class of 1985) and worked in journalism for several years until about 1992, when he took up his second career in telecommunications sales. He has held many callings in the Church, but his favorite calling is father and husband. Geoff is active in martial arts and loves hiking and skiing. Geoff has five children and lives in Colorado.

5 thoughts on “Kids are not fine in the modern family

  1. Joseph Smith warned of immorality being a key struggle in the last days. Emotion equals confusion.

  2. Wow! That’s a powerful video and so needed. Thanks for sharing. (I just wish people would stop referring to children as “kids”. Ezra Taft Benson urged us to not call our children baby goats!)

  3. When my ex wife decided that she had had enough of heterosexuality and Mormonism and chose to end our marriage “the kids will be alright” was a regular refrain from her. I plead with her to stick it out at least until they were out of the house but those pleas fell on deaf ears. Today, all four of my kids will tell you directly that they are not all right— at all.

  4. PaulM, I personally know dozens of people with similar stories, I am very sad to report. This is not just a story about homosexuality, obviously. There are plenty of hetero couples with kids who just give up on each other because they “fall out of love.” As this video points out, there is more to a married relationship than sexual attraction and “being in love.” Sometimes you stay together for the good of the kids, just because that is the honorable and selfless thing to do. Relationships will go through ups and downs, and sometimes waiting a year or two before getting divorced will fix some of the problems, especially if you are willing to try to be selfless and really work on the relationship.

    One suggestion that I have seen from marriage counselors that really works with me and my wife (and yes we are happily married): stop keeping score. So what if you are doing more work inside the house or outside the house, or changing more diapers, etc. Would Jesus sit around complaining that his wife is not doing her fair share, or would he selflessly pitch in to help out? The score will even out over time, believe me.

    Note the readers: yes, I know there are exceptions. The prophets have mentioned that infidelities and abuse create exceptions, and there are many other possible reasons why two people should not stay married. I am not passing judgement on any particular person or situation. But I think all of us can think of friends or relatives who could have stayed married for the good of the kids if they had been willing to try harder. As a society we need to do a better job of realizing that marriage is not ONLY about our own happiness and sexual fulfillment, especially when there are children involved.

    Second note: I believe in the power of the mind to create happiness and also to convince people that they are unhappy when they could be happy. As President David O. McKay stated: “Happiness is not an external condition, it is a state of the spirit and attitude of the mind” (CR, October 1934, p. 93). You can choose to be happy, although it is not always easy. This includes choosing to be happy about your marriage, concentrating on the positive things in your marriage rather than the negative.

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