Three weeks ago the most respectable girls in my singles ward threw a raging, extravagant, body-undulating Bollywood party. Fake eyelashes, gallons of hair product, body polish, forty-three different layers of make-up—several of the girls even went on-line and ordered gauzy saris and gaudy jewelry. Now, these girls are indisputably the faithful handmaidens of Zion— future Relief Society presidents, every one—but that night they were the fulfillment of Isaiah’s prophecy
about tinkling ornaments, chains, bracelets, ornaments of the leg, headbands, earrings, nose jewels, even round tires like the moon, if you count the bindis we all wore on our foreheads.
I felt like I was seeing Mormon sociology in the making. Gilbert Blythe, Mr. Darcy, and “Win a Date with Tad Hamilton†were being replaced by Abhishnek Bachchan and Bollywood sweetheart Aishwarya Ria, India’s contender for most beautiful woman in the world. What was Bollywood’s appeal? Or perhaps a more interesting question: what does Bollywood’s appeal say about Mormon cultural practices?
Some brief background for those of you not in the know. Bollywood is a prolific genre of Indian film characterized by long, circuitous love stories (~ 3-4 hours each); elaborate, stylized dance sequences; and no kissing scenes. Yep, no kissing. And starting in October, no smoking either. Sound familiar? Maybe Saturday’s Warrior meets Oklahoma? Or Pride and Prejudice: A Latter-day Comedy meets Bride and Prejudice? Actually, I don’t want to suggest that Bollywood represents some new-wave Mormon fusion. But I do want to speculate on why Bollywood and Mormonism might be a good match.
First, these movies are about family, culture, religion, and tradition, but unlike many Hollywood movies, the romantic leads don’t have to break with them in order to find happiness. Innocence and purity are valued (especially in female characters), and the movies usually end with family scenes—large, choreographed, extended family scenes. Bollywood feels no need to be iconoclastic, and that’s probably a relief to Mormon viewers who also seek fulfillment within family, culture, religion, and tradition.
Second, safe sensuality. Mormons—particularly on the Bloggernacle-–like to talk about the erotic, and Bollywood offers all the romantic tension without “that one part in the bedroom.†While Hollywood often opens doors on intimacy, Bollywood veils, defers, and euphemizes intimacy. Sexuality is handled in glances and those crazy dance sequences, not in Titanic-style heavy breathing. Perhaps this is a little juvenile—but then, maybe Mormon sexuality is a little juvenile too.
Lastly—and especially for the respectable singles ward crowd—what’s not to like about arranged marriages? Perhaps more than anything, Bollywood offers a type of Mormon utopia in which all the men are single, all the women are gorgeous, and all the parents do all the work.