Who Loves Gay People “the Most”: Prophets or Activists?

Jacob Z. Hess

When it comes to “the loving thing to do,” we continue to reach very different conclusions in the American conversation on sexuality.  Why? Our convictions about love, I argue below, arise directly from other convictions about happiness and identity itself...all of which explains contrasting evaluations of whose teachings are “loving” and whose are “destructive.”

With another Pride month upon us, rainbow flags everywhere remind us about who has decided to love gay people in their neighborhoods. But what does that really mean? And is it a question about which thoughtful, good-hearted people could legitimately, honestly disagree?

Maybe not. It’s become so common to equate support for the formalized gay rights movement with loving people more, that when a question or concern is raised about this same movement, it’s become almost automatic for (many) people to label the person raising the question as obviously “unloving.” 

And when someone suggests (as I have) that it’s possible to love gay people in a different (perhaps even better) way than is being called for in the gay rights movement, perhaps we shouldn’t be surprised with the responses. 

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Loving Those Who Sin While Still Opposing Sin Itself

I have limited time to write these days. I have a larger writing project underway and for the time being I have chosen to focus on it instead of blogging. But I want to take a moment to post a brief response to an essay that is getting some attention in social media entitled “Why ‘Love the sinner, hate the sin’ must be removed from Mormon culture.”

The difficulty with these kinds of posts is that they almost always violate their own premise. Decrying the judgmentalism of others is itself inherently judgmental. In saying that diagnosing sin requires placing oneself above another, the author is himself diagnosing sin and placing himself above the diagnosers he is diagnosing. There is simply no way to call out others for being judgmental without being hoist by your own petard. Continue reading

Reflections on a Child’s Birthday

My youngest daughter and my oldest son each have a birthday later this month. The day before their birth we didn’t know them, but in one spectacular instant they each became as much a part of our family as my wife and I.
This experience of instant bonds and connections is unique to families. In any company, team, neighborhood or even church organization there is always a period of adjustment where you get to know others and they get to know you before you find your “niche”. Not so with a family. Upon arrival there is instant acceptance and love. What an awesome phenomenon! Continue reading