The one time I was actually glad church pimpled my trip was when we went to a ward in Manhattan and I had a brunette Eve sighting.

One item that I have not come to terms with, though, particularly toting around with a gaggle of small children, is whether we should really burden an unexpecting ward with our kids (good kids, but still kids) during the primary hours. We typically do not and try to find other activities to fill the day after the sacrament service.

When I decided to come back into full activity of the Church, I began to do so in the singles branch, to which I had to move my records. No one knew me, I knew no one (except for the branch president). After one Sunday of waiting to be socialized, I decided to reach out and socialize another brother, which I’m glad I did. He’s a good friend now and helps me tremendously in church (last Sunday, he taught me how to prepare the sacrament and the table, how to bless the sacrament, how to give the trays to the brothers passing it out, and so on – first time I had done these things!). So we have a good thing going, which would not have happened had I stuck to my usual modus operandi and waited to be socialized.

There aren’t enough perfect (or even “good enough”) men to fill all the leadership slots in every single ward (though some wards can), including EQ Pres and EQ Instructor. It could be that the bishopric in that ward put the best men in charge of the youth program, and their EQ and their HPG had to get by with what was left over.

The June 2008 Ensign has an article “Reaching Out to Belong”. There’s a good paragraph in that article about taking the lead. If others don’t reach out to you, you can be the first to smile, say hello, or extend a hand.

Having said that, when I was a kid, I always made sure to attend church on Sunday — probably in part because it annoyed my non-member dad — and I still dislike the Sea Cadet officer (an adult) who told me during our leadership academy that “the US Navy doesn’t recognize Mormons as a religion” and had me go to the Catholic mass instead.

That way, if they have anything going on on Friday or Saturday night, you can go there to meet people. Whereas if your first contact is Sunday, then you’ve already missed what happened the previous fri/sat.

It may take a few phone calls back and forth between them or other people-in-the-know, while they try to get you in contact with the singles rep. But once, when I called ahead to a FHC in San Antonio Texas, and asked if they could look up the stake single rep, and give him/her my name & number for a call-back, they just handed the phone receiver to her. She was volunteering there when I called.

I was able to attend their singles group dinner-out that Friday, went with them to see the temple all lit up that night (just after the open house and prior to the dedication) and I didn’t have to show up at church on Sunday not knowing anyone.

I learned the trick on a trip to Colorado. I arrived mid-week, and dropped by the stake center just hoping for an odd chance of finding something going on. The only thing open was the FHC. They looked up a contact or two in the stake directory, and they had one person call me, then the next person I talked to was a singles rep, and then I had dinner with her that night, all within a few hours of arriving.

I went with them to a neighboring stake’s singles game night that Friday, and a singles dinner/fireside that Sunday.

Seek and indeed ye shall find.